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HOW TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF DURING A BAD BODY IMAGE DAY:
1. Recognize that fat isn’t a feeling.
There are always underlying emotions that we attach to feeling fat. When the “I feel fat” thoughts start up, try to identify what you’re feeling underneath the body dissatisfaction. Are you feeling lonely? Anxious? Invisible? Scared? Ashamed? Inadequate? Whatever the feelings are recognize that they are separate from your body.
2. Treat yourself as you would a friend.
Because it’s difficult to be kind to ourselves in the moment when the body hating thoughts take over, try responding to your thoughts as if you were supporting a friend. What would you say to someone you loved who was battling your same struggle with body image?
You wouldn’t tell them to not eat for the day in order to compensate for what they ate the previous night. You wouldn’t tell them to punish themselves for their body size through over-exercise, self-harm, or abusive eating habits. You wouldn’t tell them they were worthless or unloveable because of their weight. So why do you tell yourself these things? Break the cycle and start treating yourself like a friend—you deserve that kindness and love from everyone, especially yourself.
3. Recognize that you are so much more than the size of your body.
What you look like does not define you. It doesn’t discount your worth as a human being. You are so much more than a number on the scale. As a living, breathing, feeling human being you have inherent value. You are special and important and loved. You exist and therefore you matter.
Your appearance is such a small part of who you are, and it certainly doesn’t warrant enough power to discount the person you are inside. You aren’t your body or your weight—you are your goals and dreams and passions and values. You are your strengths and talents and insight. You are a soul and a spirit and a force of nature. Your body does not define you.
4. Shift your focus from the external to the internal.
Make a list of all the people you look up to and are inspired by—not because of their weight or appearance, but because of who they are and what they do. Write out all the qualities they have that make you appreciate and value them.
Use the list as a reminder that it’s the internal things—our dreams and passions and goals and morals and insight and character—that truly define who we are and draw people to us; not how we look.
You are no exception to this. Try making your own list of things you like about yourself that have nothing to do with appearance or body size. If you have a difficult time creating one, ask some friends and family to help you.
5. Think about what you want to be remembered for after you die.
I don’t want people to remember me for what I looked like, what size jeans I wore, or what I weighed. I want to be remembered for the person I am. I want to be remembered as someone who brought about positive change in the world. I want to be remembered as loving friend, partner, and family member. I want to be remembered for my passions and my creativity and my strength. I want to be remembered as someone who made a difference. What do you want your legacy to be? Chances are, it doesn’t have to do with weight.
6. Instead of focusing on the size of your body, start focusing on what your body allows you to do.
The human body is an incredible force. When we get caught up in the number on the scale and size of clothes however, we forget just how lucky we are to have a fully functioning vehicle to engage in life with. So stop hating your body for the way it looks and start acknowledging and appreciating your body for all that it allows you to do.
Make a list of each activity and feat your body helps you to partake in and accomplish. If you want to be even more specific, list out each body part and describe all the things you wouldn’t be able to do without it. Your body is strong, powerful, and beautiful, regardless of it’s size. Choose to treat it with love, compassion, and gratitude instead of hate and judgement.
7. Challenge your negative thoughts.
You may not be able to change the way you feel about your body today, tomorrow, or a month from now, but you can begin the process by challenging the thoughts in the moment. Write out a dialogue between your negative voice and a healthy voice. If you have a hard time coming up with positive counters to the negative thoughts, pretend that you are speaking positively about a friend or loved one.
Even if you don’t believe the things you say to counter the voice, it’s still important to speak out against it, because each time you argue with the thoughts, you are taking away some of their power and reclaiming your own. The more you challenge the thoughts, the less you will believe them. The more you argue back, the easier fighting the voice will become.
8. Allow yourself to feel your feelings.
There is a lot of built up energy and emotion underlying the way we feel about our bodies. Holding in how we feel or engaging in behaviors to numb out may make us feel better in the moment, but in the long run, it doesn’t remedy the pain we feel. It doesn’t make us feel better and it keeps us stuck.
Releasing the energy and painful emotions underlying our body shame requires us to feel our feelings. Whether that means throwing a tantrum on the floor, venting to a friend on the phone, punching a pillow, screaming in your car, or crying in bed, you need to allow yourself to feel your feelings. Let go of the judgement you have about what you feel and recognize that you are feeling these things for a reason. Give yourself permission to release your emotions and let everything out.
9. Do self care.
When you’re struggling with body image, distract yourself with healthy coping mechanisms. Take a bubble bath, get a message, ask for a back scratch, cuddle with a pet, make plans with a supportive friend, watch your favorite movie, get a manicure, listening to calming music, do deep breathing—whatever it is, make sure it’s something self-soothing and helps you get out of your head.
10. Be kind with yourself.
You may not be able to control the way you feel about your body, but you can control what you do in response to how you feel.
Instead of beating yourself up, you can choose to treat yourself with compassion. Instead of engaging in unhealthy and abusive behaviors, you can choose to do self-care. Instead of treating your body as an enemy, you can choose to treat it as a friend. Instead of isolating yourself, you can choose to reach out for support and surround yourself with positive people who make you feel loved and accepted. Instead of agreeing with the negative thoughts, you can choose to challenge them.
***You have more power than you think—don’t let the way you feel about your body keep you from living.
Coping with bad body image days may not be easy, but it is possible.
Don’t give up.
You aren’t alone.
Things can and will get better.
(via forwhenyouneedhope)
| The original post only has US helplines. I've added UK helplines underneath. It would be great if people could add numbers from everywhere in the world. | |
| Depression Hotline: | 1-630-482-9696 |
| Suicide Hotline: | 1-800-784-8433 |
| LifeLine: | 1-800-273-8255 |
| Trevor Project: | 1-866-488-7386 |
| Sexuality Support: | 1-800-246-7743 |
| Eating Disorders Hotline: | 1-847-831-3438 |
| Rape and Sexual Assault: | 1-800-656-4673 |
| Grief Support: | 1-650-321-5272 |
| Runaway: | 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000 |
| Exhale: | After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253 |
| Child Abuse: | 1-800-422-4453 |
| UK Helplines: | |
| Samaritans (for any problem): | 08457909090 e-mail jo@samaritans.org |
| Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): | 08001111 |
| Mind infoline (mental health information): | 0300 123 3393 e-mail: info@mind.org.uk |
| Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): | 0300 466 6463 legal@mind.org.uk |
| b-eat eating disorder support: | 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: help@b-eat.co.uk |
| b-eat youthline (for under 25's with eating disorders): | 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) |
| Cruse Bereavement Care: | 08444779400 e-mail: helpline@cruse.org.uk |
| Frank (information and advice on drugs): | 0800776600 |
| Drinkline: | 0800 9178282 |
| Rape Crisis England & Wales: | 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail info@rapecrisis.org.uk |
| Rape Crisis Scotland: | 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight |
| Some Italian numbers, I'm sorry they're not all. | |
| Telefono Amico (for support in case of depression, solitude, all kind of emotional needs): | 199 284 284 (every day, 10am - 24pm) |
| Telefono Azzurro (for kids and teenagers): | 1 96 96 (24h a day, 365 days a year); 114 (for immediate danger, 24h every day) |
| Antiviolenza Donne (for women victims of any sort of violence): | 1522 (24h every day) |
| Alcolisti Anonimi (Alcoholics anonymous): | 06 66.36.620 |
(via badtimingandme)
Daniell Koepke (via sarahtheimpossible)
(Source: polyamorouslife, via badtimingandme)
(via fyspringfield)
Apologies for the terrible image quality - I’m lacking scanner access at the minute so I had to take these photos on my phone
I was reading hyperbole and a half’s blog entry explaining their experience of depression and decided to make another sketchy comic based on my experiences with anxiety, which is another mental illness I think people tend to misunderstand quite frequently
Hopefully this will be of use to some people - whether they suffer from anxiety themselves or if they just want to know more about it
(via bookercatch)
Fat people do not have to be healthy in order to deserve dignity
Fat people do not have to be healthy in order to deserve dignity
Fat people do not have to be healthy in order to deserve dignity
If I see someone say, “It’s ok to be fat as long as you’re healthy,” one more time I’m gonna lose it. I know this is a crazy radical idea, but how about someone’s health has nothing to do with how you should treat them or how much respect they are deserving of?
(via seaof-lines)
Inspidered (via Loading Artist)
<3
THE FACT THAT A SPIDER IS SAYING THIS MAKES IT THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN EVER
(via badtimingandme)
Depression Part 2 by Hyperbole and a Half is the most important thing you’ll read all day.
(via runeybadger)
Depression and anxiety can be humiliating illnesses to live with. Due to a wide variety of social factors, the way we’re raised, the media, having an ongoing condition that constantly undermines you but has no outward showing symptoms is something that is still not properly…